Tuesday, April 10, 2018

Darth Vader sulking.

The other night we went out to a Labour get together/party. And it was amazing! Everybody was made to feel welcome and everyone I met was friendly. And I noticed a few other wonky people, I was the only one in a wheelchair though. And this gave rise to me thinking like Darth Vader, ‘come, gather round. I will be your leader.’ This seemed reasonable to me.
But then I realised that,

a, I’m no leader.
And,
b, They are their own leaders.

In your mind, swap my wheelchair for a chariot. No? Still no followers? Ok, I give up. Imagine Darth  Vader pulling a sulky face, before he disappears in a cloud of smoke.

Then my phone disappeared and had been bundled up in my bedding, and chucked in the machine......FUCK!! It’s amazing how quickly you can become dependant on them. I use mine for all sorts!! I had to cope for 24 hours without it, and that’s not a 24 hours I’d like to repeat. Sad cow that I am. I write my blog on it......hello world! I order clothes, book travel plans on it.... book tickets, look up weather, look people up on it, be they Jo Cox or Tommy Robinson or anywhere in between. It just keeps me in touch.....y’know? And with that I’m gonna get back to my book....

Oh yeah, and it’s a phone!
And with that.... I thank you

Friday, April 6, 2018

Norwegian.

As I seem to naturally gravitate towards Scandinavian tv I thought maybe I should learn some. I picked Norwegian, and I am sad to admit that after four whole days, I’m not fluent. I’m better at understanding the written word, than I am at understanding the spoken word. It sounds similar to German, which I didn’t learn that at school (favouring French and Spanish, both of which I passed, unbelievably, if this effort is anything to go by. My brother told me many moons ago, to do German, and I’m regretting ignoring him now. AND I’ve never been to Spain, so what do I know? As it turns out, NADA. RIEN.
INGENTING. NICHTS. NANI MO (my favourite😂the only thing you can do with Japanese is love it)
It would also seem I’m a fan of anything featuring a dead body. These bodies would preferably be the work of fiction, and not a slasher film.

I think my friends must think I’m a bit of a political nutter. You know when you’re stumbling over your words....? Me; “You know, pretty lady, lived on a narrow boat, had been at a meeting, got stabbed when she came out. You know!!? What’s her name...?” Out come the phones. JO COX!!
And at the other end of the spectrum, a man, I can only think to describe as a rascist, homophobic C***. Ah, my mum would be so proud. Anyway, his name escapes me again. TOMMY ROBINSON. Ugh, that feels so awful in my mouth. I shudder.